Yin and Yang

The last week of my life has been tough, to say the least.  The first two days of the week contained two unexpected, tragic deaths, as well as a divorce.  In addition to this, a girlfriend of mine had a tragedy in her life by losing a nephew to the current heroin epidemic.  Another girlfriend is dealing with a new breast cancer diagnosis while going through a divorce.

We have so many difficult things to get through as life progresses.  I would have loved to spend the week doing nothing other than holding my loved ones in my arms.  But of course, that's not reality.  Reality is going to work every day while life continues to happen around us.  And as Murphy's Law so likes to dictate, it happened to be an extremely stressful week at work as well.

Luckily, there is a yin and yang to life.  And despite all of the extremely difficult happenings of the week, thankfully there were many wonderful things as well.  This week showed me the value of friendship, as I received much support from my friends.  I was also surprised with flowers at work from a friend after I had a difficult day.  I had the pleasure of getting my girls ready for their first high school dance.  I was honored to have a friend share something with me that he has never been able to share with anyone in his life.  He told me he felt freed by telling me and was very grateful.  I was glad I could give him the gift of acceptance and non-judgement.  I gave a hug to an overwhelmed co-worker, which she greatly appreciated (but I have always felt that a hug is a gift to both parties and she has been there much for me in the past).  This week also brought my sister home for a week, before she is off for a second year as a world traveler and volunteer.

In summary, life can be devastatingly heartbreaking as well as breathtakingly beautiful ... all at the same time.  And all we can do is survive it and live our best each day.  Some days will bring more hardships and some days will bring more joys.  Hang on for the ride, My Loves, for those good moments/days make your heart sing.

Yinning and Yanging,

Me


Motivational Moment:

Life can be hard and tragic at times, but it is during those times that you have friends and family to lean on.  And then, during their rough times, you can offer your support.  I urge you to reach out to your friends and/or family when you are experiencing lows in life.  And above all, hang in there, for tomorrow may bring your day of unexpected, yet beautiful joy.

(On a light-hearted side note, when I was looking up the definition of 'yin and yang', I was surprised to see this on dictionary.com: yin: "negative, dark, and feminine"; yang: "positive, bright, and masculine".  Wait ... what?!  Why is feminine equated with negative and dark whereas masculine is equated with positive and bright???  I don't know about you, but most of the cheerleaders of life that I know of are females.)

Love and Hugs,
SG

Friends and Chicken Soup

A Thank You to my beautiful friend Karen and her big heart.  This kind soul found out I was sick and a day later she brings me this delicious, homemade, chicken soup.  The little darling even bought me gluten free noodles to go with it.

Thank you my friend for your friendship, your thoughtfulness, and your healing chicken soup!


Enjoying Every Last Drop,
Me


Motivational Moment:

Karen recently talked me into going to her yoga class.  I have, thus far, not had good experiences trying out yoga - let's just say I am NOT the least bit limber nor can I ever breathe how they tell me to breathe throughout the class.

I am happy to say, the instructor, Ken, is an amazing man who exudes peace and relaxation, and teaches a very stress-free yoga class (although I am not crazy about the downward dog).  (I will also note here as an aside, that Ken is ridiculously limber, as in he-should-be-a-contortionist he is so freakishly limber!)

During one of these classes, Ken played a beautiful, soulful version of the song Time After Time (I know the song as it was sung by Cyndi Lauper).  I had to find out the singer because I had to have this version of the song!  He said the singer was Eva Cassidy.  Karen then told me that Eva tragically passed away in her early 30s from cancer (melanoma). 

The motivational part of this Motivational Moment is two-fold:

1.  May you have good friends that not only enrich your life, but introduce you to other beautiful souls who also touch your life;

2.  I encourage you to look up some songs of Eva Cassidy; even though her life was cut short by cancer, she continues to touch many with her beautiful voice.

Peace, Love, and Hugs my friends!
SG

The Beauty of Connecting

This blog is a sequel to my Joys of Being Highly Sensitive blog.  I think another benefit - a quite enormous benefit - of being Highly Sensitive, is experiencing so much enjoyment out of mere human connections.

The past few weeks have brought several varied occasions to my life and all touched me due to my sensitive nature - for which I feel blessed.  Here are a few quick snapshots of these occasions: 

 - A good friend moved out of state.  I will greatly miss spending time with this very calm friend of mine, but I cherish that our paths crossed at work those many years ago.  Her going away get together was an evening filled with much laughter and love with a few close girlfriends, which was truly wonderful.

 - End of the school year choir and orchestra concerts for my daughters.  The proud joy of seeing them grow up into beautiful, intelligent teenagers.  Chatting with a few families of their classmates, who we have known for nine years now, and enjoying the friendly camaraderie.  Getting an unexpected hug from an acquaintance who knows I've been going through a tough year; the unexpectedness of this thoughtfulness is very appreciated.

 - Connecting with a co-worker and then having him share some devastating health news.  I was honored that he reached out and so glad that he and I got to know each other on a personal level.

 - Having friends who offer support, laughter, kindness, hugs.  Making new connections that bring so much love and light into my world.

 - Hugs!  Being Highly Sensitive, I cannot express enough the re-assuring and life-affirming benefits of hugs.  They offer peace to the soul.  They give to both parties at the same time.  There is so much stress and sadness and tragedy in life.  Lean on your fellow beings; we are all sharing the same time on earth for our life's journeys; we all go through stress and hardship.  Laughter and love, smiles and hugs, these are what help everyone get through life.

I often get my feelings hurt being Highly Sensitive; I often feel slighted.  But Oh Baby - the joy and peace and happiness and exhilaration I get from connecting with others.  It is beautiful and I would not trade it for anything in the world.

I originally titled this blog "The Beauty of Human Connections" but then a girlfriend of mine reached out to me this morning telling me her beloved dog had passed away during the night.  She made me realize that pets also offer us humans much comfort in our lives.  She said it best, "There is nothing in this world that can give you the unconditional love that you get from your dog."  What an impactful statement.  Dogs are always so thrilled to see their owners when they get home.  Always.  Day after day, year after year, dogs are always happy to see you - no human relation gives you that.  So while my original intent was human connections, I absolutely honor those who have had their lives greatly improved by the relationship with their beloved pets.

Today, I wish you beautiful connections that soothe your soul - whether that be laughing with friends, hugging your loved ones, or chilling with your pets. 

After all, we are all human, and as such, we thrive on love. 

Sending you all love,
Me

Motivational Moment:

Today's moment is dedicated to my mom, who is such a wonderful grandma to my three daughters.  My lovely momma bought my three daughters these orchids for their end of school year concerts.  I adore, cherish, and love you momma!

Enjoy beauty and love today, my friends, for we are not promised tomorrow.

Peace, Hugs, and Love,
SG

Karen and the Flying Squirrel

Last night, I had dinner with three girlfriends.  Three of us are in our mid-40s, one of us is in the late 50s.  Now, out of the 4 of us, who do you think is the most sprightly and energetic?  Well, if you guessed the 57 year-old, you are correct!  Karen is a little spitfire!  She has amazing passion and energy, which impresses me immensely.

During our dinner conversation (which entails the four of us jumping rapidly from one topic to the next), Karen starts talking about this flying squirrel and how beautiful it was and how she just loves it.  She said her elderly uncle (he is in his late 80s), who lives in a century home, had caught the flying squirrel in a rat trap.  He said he heard all of this noise up in the rafters and it ended up being a flying squirrel that was running around dragging this rat trap behind him.  Here is a snippet of our conversation:

Karen: This little squirrel is SO beautiful (she showed us a close up picture of its little face).  I wanted to find a mom that home schools her kids to see if she wanted it. In the meantime, I had it in my trunk because the weather was below freezing but when the weather warmed up, I had to put it in my freezer.

Me: Wait, what?!  Karen, is this squirrel DEAD?!

Karen: Well of course it's dead!

My two other friends and I really started dying of laughter at this point.  We ALL had thought she was talking about an ALIVE squirrel whom she wanted to give as a pet to a mom that home-schooled.  But no, she wanted to give this beautiful little creature that she adored (and that just so happened to be dead), to a mom that home-schooled so it could be dissected!!!  The even crazier part is that Karen did end up finding a mom that home-schooled that was just as excited as she was to have this beautiful, dead, little squirrel.

Karen then proceeded to tell us how she found a beautiful fox on the side of the road when she was in her 30s.  She was all dressed up and wearing high-heeled boots but she pulled over when she saw the fox.  She said that she went up to it and took off her boot to poke it to make sure it wasn't still alive.  The last thing she wanted was to go and pick it up by the tail and find out it was merely stunned and not dead and have it attack her.  She ended up taking it home to her mom's freezer; she really wanted to make a hat out of this beautiful fox.  Alas, the years went by and her mom eventually threw it out since Karen never did get around to making that fox hat.

The final story of the night from Karen had us rolling with laughter again.  Staying on her road-kill theme, (Road-kill Queen is what my other friend called her after these stories), she told us about a deer. This was many years ago and she had her young daughter in the front seat of her Ford Granada.  She was driving through a park and saw a police officer on the side of the road with a dead deer.  Karen asked if she could have it.  The officer said yes, but since he was in uniform he could not help Karen load it into her car.  Karen grabbed a bag from the car to put it over the deer's head so her daughter didn't see it.  Then she dragged the deer to her car.  She realized quickly that she was not going to be able to lift it into her trunk, so she crawled into the back seat and pulled the deer into her car that way.

You have to picture Karen to truly get an idea of how ludicrous this scenario is: Karen is 5'2" and weighs 95 pounds.  She is a peanut.  I am sure the deer was a lot bigger and heavier than her.  And yet there she was, in her 20's, with a young daughter in the front seat, pulling this freshly dead deer into her back seat.  The image of her doing this will always bring a smile to my face.

Karen is literally the toughest woman I know (and this, obviously, is not at all due to her size).  She has no fear, she is all strength.  She feels strongly about her convictions, she unapologetically voices her opinion and lives her life.  I admire her strength both literally and figuratively.  And above all, she truly is a good person.

To Karen - I am thankful our paths crossed at work many years ago and I have the pleasure of being your friend.

Laughingly and Lovingly Yours,
SG

Motivational Moment:

We all go through ups and downs in our life.  The trick is to keep going through the tough times and know, as our mothers and grand-mothers have always said: "This too shall pass."

I wasn't in the mood to go out last night.  I would have been fine laying on the couch, wallowing in my misery.  But I am so glad that I pushed through those negative feelings and went out.  I ended up having a night of boisterous laughter - more so than I have had in years.  It's these unexpected gems in life that help us through the rough times.

Wishing you good friends and lots of laughter on your journey of life.  Hugs, SG


 

My Sister's Journey

My sister is currently on a personal life journey to reset her life from the losses she has endured to a life of love, light, and laughter. 

Anyone following me knows that I am a big proponent of love.  I have even blogged about this propensity.  I love LOVE.  I love all things about love.  I love how life seems happier and more do-able when I think from a mindset of love versus a mindset of negativity (no matter what that negativity may be - anger, jealousy, hurt, disappointment, disillusionment), when I reset my thoughts and think of love (love of oneself, love of others, love of life, etc.), I am a much happier and much more positive person.  And that is my grounding state.  I like being happy and thinking good about others versus the opposite, so when something happens that takes me away from this outlook, it takes time, but I am naturally pulled back to it.  (I will note here that this past week has been a difficult one for me because someone, who I considered a friend, treated me very wrong - ironically via the 'holiday of love' - Valentine's Day - and affected my life view negatively.  It will take some time to get back to my grounded state, but I am much better today than I was a week ago, and even feel more hopeful and strong as I write this blog).

My sister has had two failed marriages and has lost five babies to miscarriage.  These, and other events, have had their mark on her.  But here's the thing - my sister is a beautiful soul.  There is no other way to describe her.  She has such a strong light shining in her and her hope for people, for humanity as a whole, is so strong that she is taking this journey to give back to the world in the hope of resetting her life.  She believes in people; she believes people can change; she believes in hard work and high ethics; she believes in self-improvement.  She has the most honest and truest character of anyone I have ever met. This journey has her traveling to missionaries around the world to help others in need; she is truly risking her life by traveling alone and doing this; it is something I could have never undertaken.  But this is who she is.  She is strong willed and extremely trusting of the human spirit and in the universe.

Due to who my sister is, due to her beautiful soul, I wanted to sent this blog out in support of her.  If any of you are interested in her story or are interested in sending her some financial support, here is her link: Reset Journey 

I will note here that some people are negative towards her for asking for money to do this; they feel that they shouldn't pay for her 'vacation'.  My thoughts on this negativity: 1. Anyone feeling that negative can stay away as we do not want this negativity sent towards her; and 2. I am extremely impressed that she not only has the guts to do a journey like this, but that she is that beautiful of a soul and hopeful of the human spirit to even think of doing a journey like this, let alone actually doing it.  Because let me tell you folks - my dream of finding myself in a journey entails a beautiful beach, a comfy chair under a big umbrella, good food, and good books!

Sending you all love and hugs on this beautiful sunny day.
SG

Motivational Moment:

Today's Moment is a Life’s Little LaughablesTM from my youngest daughter (and talk about another source of pure love for me - my three kiddos!).

We were getting out of the car the other day and her knee made a little cracking sound.  She immediately exclaims: "I am way too young to be this old!".  She is 10 years old.  Love that girl!

Peace, Love, and Hugs my friends.  SG

Gaining Perspective from My Daughter

The holidays are always a busy time with family.  And, as all families know, family time tends to have its share of disagreements, conflict, and hurt feelings.  Being true to this phenomenon, we had our share of arguments over the holidays.  We had just spent a couple of days talking about a specific conflict that had occurred between two teenage cousins.  When this conflict had been brought up yet again, my 13 year-old daughter passionately said, "I'm so sick of everyone putting everyone else down and talking badly about others!  Can't we just get along and stop being so negative?!"

Her emphatic statement immediately shut down my inquiry into the argument and what she had overheard.  It made me pause and reflect.  And then I said, "How right you are.  We are who we are. We need to accept and love each other for who we are!"  Her perspective ended any further comments about the argument or the personalities of the two cousins involved.

It is a shame that negative thoughts and actions seem to come out so readily when with family. Why do we behave our worst with the ones we love the most?  Love and acceptance would definitely stop many of those conflicts.

May we all learn to accept and love each other for who we are.

Wishing you peace and acceptance for 2016!
SG

Motivational Moment:

The same daughter referenced in this blog has a beautifully creative mind and loves reading and writing.  She also has an eye for beauty.  Today's Motivational Moment, as well as today's blog, is dedicated to her.  These are pictures she took after school one day while waiting for me to pick her up.

Love and Hugs,
SG

The Joys Of Being Highly Sensitive

I am a Highly Sensitive Person.  I didn't know there was an actual characterization for my kind of personality, but there is.  And even more of a shocker to me, is the co-worker, who after knowing me for only a short time at a new job (many years ago), gave me the book titled: "The Highly Sensitive Person" by Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D.  This co-worker was a pretty tough chick, who surprised me with her sensitivity or 'in tune-ness' to those around her.

The down side of being highly sensitive is that my feelings are often hurt but what I perceive to be a cold world or insensitive, non-caring people.  In addition, I am often overwhelmed by how much there is to do, or by too many people, or too much noise ... it all ends up being too much stress for my system.  And it also unfortunately means I am highly sensitive to physical pain, to hunger, and to weather extremes.

However, there is an AMAZING upside to being highly sensitive, and that is how deeply affected I am by beauty.  It can be something as simple as colors, a gorgeous sunset, a laughing person, a smiling baby, a kind action by a stranger, and of course, excitement or happiness from my daughters. I truly LOVE this aspect of being highly sensitive because it makes moments of life absolutely precious.

Here are some examples of the beauty that truly makes being alive a pure joy to me:

1. An Artist's Talent:

    - Yesterday we were at Twins Day and my daughters love having t-shirts made from the airbrush artist.  Something as simple as this, struck me with amazement and beauty.  The artist's work was beautiful, creative, and fun!  The colors she uses are gorgeous to me.  I could have watched her work all day.  I would love to be that creative, to be able to free-hand drawings, to come up with beautiful color combinations, to write in many different kinds of lettering, etc.  I was in awe of her talent.  Here is a sample of her work (to the delight and thrill of my daughters and I):

Shaffer Airbrushing by Christina Shaffer

Fireworks (which I also love) ended the night at Twins Days

2. The Healing Touch of Massage:

    - I often write about my love of massages.  Being Highly Sensitive, a massage does wonders for me.  It reduces stress, it relaxes me, and most of all, it gives me reassurance in the kindness of strangers and that beautiful sentiment of loving one another - soul to soul.  I recently went to a new masseuse.  I am always game for trying new masseuses because I simply love massages.  Obviously, I didn't know this person at all, her personality or her technique, but I ended up LOVING it.  I really can't put into words how strongly this massage affected me.  We didn't talk, I laid there immersed in the music, the aroma, and her amazing touch.  I don't know how describe it other than it was as if she was transferring love into my being from her being.  I left that massage and could have wept due to the beauty of the experience; THAT, my friends, is a joy and privilege of being highly sensitive.

3. Serendipity (I mention this often in my blogs and love the fortunate/happy aspect of it):

   - Since this HSP book was given to me about 17 years ago, I have not looked at it in years.  I pulled it out to reference the author for this blog, and was again amazed at the perfect description it provides for who I am.  I also find it reassuring that there are others out there like me.  She writes that Highly Sensitive People (HSP) are overwhelmed by bright lights, strong smells, coarse fabrics; by having a lot to do in a short amount of time; avoid violent movies and TV shows; enjoy delicate tastes, scents, sounds, and art work; and lastly have a rich and complex inner life.  And for the record, according to her, us HSPs make up 20 percent of the population ... 50 million people in the United States.  And of course, "Sensitivity is anything but a flaw"!

4. All Things Beautiful:

   - I thoroughly enjoy all things beautiful: music, artwork, books, quotes, smells, good food (especially desserts), kind people, and laughter.  Laughter is one of the best gifts of all.

5. My Daughters:

   - As my daughters start their pre-teen and teen years, I am enjoying seeing the individuals they are becoming as well as their intelligence, their wit, and their sense of humor.  I love discussing life with them.  I especially love laughing with them.

Sensitively Yours,
Me

Motivational Moment:

As mentioned in the beginning of this blog, my feelings often get hurt by people who I feel are very thoughtless or uncaring; I am not that kind of person and I struggle with those who I perceive as thoughtless.  Tonight I am struggling with my frustration and hurt by a family member who I feel is completely about herself and her family.  I am trying to get my head around how anyone can be that way, particularly to the detriment of other family members.  As I sit here writing this, I realize it is me being overly sensitive and that I need to come to terms with people who are like this.  With that said, I came across a book called: "The Bounce Back Book.  How to thrive in the face of adversity, setbacks, and losses" by Karen Salmansohn, and I decided to put some quotes from this book in today's Motivational Moment, to not only help me, but anyone else who is currently dealing with hurt or disappointment.

 - "In life, you always have a choice.  Be weak or be strong."
 - "You are not alone ... Everyone has times of intense difficulties."
 - "Think of life as a gigantic ice cream parlor with infinite flavors to taste."
 - "Laughter is contagious good health."
 - "What goes down often bounces back even higher."
 - "The best is yet to come." Frank Sinatra  (Hope.  I love hope.  It brings infinite possibilities.)

Wishing you all a good day, full of laughter, smiles, and hope.
SG