None of us know what tomorrow brings, let alone the next decade. We aren't provided with little informational books telling us what comes next in each of our lives. And let me tell you, now that I have hit menopause, I wish I had that instruction book.
I remember someone saying to me that I would miss my period once it was gone. At that time, I thought, 'are you nuts?!'. I have hated my period since it started. I always had horrendous bleeding and cramps. I particularly remember sitting in my French class my Sophomore year of high school, with pain so bad that I was rocking in my seat, shaking, feeling like I was going to puke or pass out. My period was excruciating and all-encompassing and it made my life a nightmare for at least 3 days of the 7-10 days that I had it each month. So when the comment was made to me that I would miss it, I thought no way that was ever going to happen.
And then it happened. I turned 50 and my period stopped. Well, it took a few years of getting more and more infrequent - first 3 months, then 6 months, then 8 months - before it stopped for a year. Then my daughters came home from college and had their periods, and I had one final HUGE one, that I thought was going to be the death of me, as my body synced up with theirs. One last hurrah before official menopause.
When it first left, I felt sad. And that surprised me. But for the first time, I was now out of the 'sisterhood of the periods' - that monthly sorority where we all had to deal with bleeding and all the not-so-fun accoutrements that came with it. I was officially no longer able to have kids. And I was naively unaware of how detrimental it is to the female body to no longer have that estrogen. The negative cardiac and bone side effects aren't initially evident and certainly not as in-your-face as the hot flashes and initial hair loss. You're just living your life and all of a sudden you get HOT - and I mean face-flushing, body-feeling-like-a-thousand-degrees, and sweating everywhere, HOT. And after a few of them, you are like, OH...this must be a hot flash. And just like that, they are now a part of your life. You never know when they are going to hit (like at dinner or during the night or any time it is hot). And then there was the hair loss. I had NO idea that we lost hair with menopause! Like a LOT. Every shower, it would come out by the handfuls. I literally thought it was going to keep up and I would be bald. And your hair becomes so dry; I went from having to wash it daily since it would be so greasy, to becoming so dry that no way could I wash it daily. And then there was the brain fog. If I didn't write things down, I didn't remember them. And best of all was the RAGE. The wanting to scream at everyone. The non-stop frustration. Oh and the pure joy of finding out that menopause can cause anxiety - what a thrill for someone who has had anxiety most of their life! And then also hearing about how detrimental losing that estrogen is to our bones and cardiovascular system. Terrifying! So HELLO to this next stage of life. You don't want it to be here, yet, here it is (even though you thought you would welcome it!). And it really is a big wake-up call to aging and this next, post-menopausal, stage of life.
But here's the thing, it isn't all bad. The copious amounts of hair falling out, did stop after about 6 months. And I just had my haircut and the girl at the salon made a comment about how much hair I had! I said I lost so much of it through menopause and she said 'if this is you with thin hair, I can't imagine what it was like before!'. So see - not all bad. It did come back. And the few years of rage also faded. I had NO idea that the rage was hormone related! Just thought I was becoming quite the angry person. But then you find others going through it or who already have gone through it, and you feel seen. There are many social media accounts that are absolutely hilarious in describing all of this stuff. Shared experiences, and laughter, absolutely help us during hard times. And I love the literal bad asses we become, after being told how and who to be our whole lives, we now stand up for ourselves and no longer take the crap. I am all for that! When I look back on some of the horrible bosses or even relationships I had, that is one thing I would change if I could - to stand up for myself and not put up with the mistreatment. Here's to us women finding our voices and our new paths, post-menopause! I have seen so many wonderful stories of women who follow their dreams and create new, amazing lives for themselves in this era! Love it and hope more do it - I certainly plan to! 🌟
Now on to Empty Nest. Empty Nest is also one wild ride that we just happen to get on with no forethought, because until then, we are insanely busy living life, raising our kids, doing laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, and working full time! And then your last kid goes away to college, or leaves the house, and the next thing you know is that you are at the grocery store and instead of a huge cart of weekly groceries, now you barely fill up a little basket. And that hit me hard. I found that little basket of groceries so very sad. It felt like an advertisement that I had an empty nest. The kitchen garbage can no longer filled up every two days; the dishwasher hardly needed to run. And the refrigerator and pantry were woefully sparse, for the first time since having kids twenty years ago!
My three girls are now home for the summer. The twins are officially college graduates; one is going on for a one-year master's program with a semester in Luxembourg. My youngest just completed her freshman year of college. And let me tell you, house full = heart full. 💖 My girls are home, and this momma's heart is so very happy (and my grocery cart and fridge are packed!). I know this time is fleeting. My girls will soon be spreading their wings and making their own paths, so I am cherishing this full house for as long as I have it.
Heart Full(y) Yours,
Me
Motivational Moment
I like ending my posts with one of my Life’s Little Laughables® whether it be a funny moment (because laughter makes everything better!), a tender moment, or a motivational moment. Today, I wanted to note my appreciation of not only my twins graduating from college after 4 successful years, but also of the fact that my mom was able to come with us. We were all healthy to attend both college graduations (and since these were the 2020 high school graduates who didn't get to walk their high school graduation, it was even more special).
One of the many things I love about traveling with family, is that you get to spend quality time together since you are simply hanging out with each other the whole time. When we are at home, everyone is busy doing their own thing most of the time, and you really don't see each other much. Plus, the older we all get, the less time we get to spend with our adult kids as well as our parents. When travelling, I find it's the little ordinary moments that I cherish. For example, we had 3 hotel rooms for our family and the hotel offered breakfast. I loved the chill time hanging out before bedtime as well as getting to enjoy our relaxing breakfast together, before a very busy day of graduation activities and move outs. There was also the trip to the hotel, where all of a sudden, we were on a 7-mile road that literally looked like it should be a driveway (cue all the horror movies in the middle of nowhere)! I am pleased to say that everything went pretty perfect for both college weekends (I inherited my planning genes from my mom!). Cherish all the little unexpected relaxing or funny moments in your travel as well as your day-to-day life; they make our lives so much more enjoyable.
Lastly, I want to mention that I have created an Instagram account, as well as journals, for the Life’s Little Laughables® brand! So now you can purchase a journal to create your very own cherished memoir of funny and heartfelt life moments as well as follow along and share on Instagram (@LifesLittleLaughables)! The journals are sold on Amazon and if you record your happy or heartfelt moments in them, these journals will become your treasured keepsakes.
Cherish Life's Special Moments.
Laugh and Love as much as you can every day.
Big Hugs and Love being sent to all as we all navigate our way through this thing called Life!
SG
